I had every intention of blogging about my day yesterday at Gomarus (another excellent one, mind you), but I just received an e-mail that has thrown me for quite the loop.
I have a very difficult decision to make in the next month or so. At the beginning of the semester I had to apply for student teaching. On the application we have to give some sort of indication where we want to student teach: local, not local (a state other than Iowa, basically), or international. Originally I figured I would do the first half of my student teaching in a bigger city involved in a large public school, and the second half I would complete in Sioux Center so that I could finish my career at Dordt with my friends. Well, the second half of this e-mail informed me that to receive my TESL endorsement I have to student teach internationally. I wasn't completely aware of this, but this obviously makes a lot of sense to me.
Originally I had planned for this semester and my internship at Gomarus to be an indication to me as to whether or not teaching internationally was something I really wanted, but evidently I have to decide whether or not it's something I really want before the end of March... pressure on. Today in our portfolio group we talked about stress and putting things in the hands of God. I opened the session with 1 Peter 5:6-7, a verse about just that. We then talked about different things we stress about. One of the members of my group mentioned how he really only stresses over life decisions: college, career, etc. I, on the other hand, have never had to stress about life decisions because I make them so far in advance. I chose Dordt as a junior in high school, chose my career path early, etc. Usually I stress little things like scholarships, assignments, people's opinions, etc. But of course, the time has come when I have to make a life decision quite rapidly. I don't have all sorts of time to think through everything. The choice is this: do I take the route I've been intending all along and ditch the TESL international, or do I go after something I think I really want but forfeit my last semester with my friends, family, etc and risk finding out that international teaching isn't for me? yeah, that's a lot more stress than I really want to deal with right now. But I suppose I have to take my own advice. It's in God's hands, Jennifer. Do what you must and take it one step at a time, pray, consult those who know you best and who want the best for you, weigh all your options, and did I mention pray?
So, right before Belgium I get this e-mail that stresses me out in a few different ways, but I'm choosing to put it on the back burner for a few days. It'll all work out. I have over a month. Yes, only a month, but still it is time enough. I have all these wonderful things going on around me right now that I'm going to appreciate, and I will just take it one step at a time and trust it's all going to work out.
On a lighter note, Gomarus yesterday was wonderful and Katrina and I explored Groningen a bit more as well: beautiful. Today I met with the principal and a bilingual teacher at the public school in Zwolle and that went wonderfully. All these awesome opportunities are opening up for me and I love it! After that meeting, LaRae and I went skating with our host mom and brother. I still stink at skating even in Europe, but it was really fun. A couple of the SPICE buddies showed up, too. All in all a good week, despite that scary e-mail, and now I get to enjoy a weekend in Belgium with some great people. So, again, no update for a few days. Sorry!
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